This month we celebrate National Coming Out Day, October 11th, a day to recognize and celebrate LGBTQ2S+ persons coming out and finding their place amongst LGBTQ2S+ communities.
Based on the belief that homophobia thrives in an atmosphere of silence and ignorance, it is important to have conversations around visibility, community support, safety, and self-determination.
We cheer alongside those in our communities, no matter where you are in your coming out journey, you are seen, you are loved and valid, just as you are.
Some of our Pflag volunteers shared their own experiences around the topic of Coming Out:
Lisa, (Pflag Parent and Support Committee Lead)
"I had several common responses when one of my 14-year-old twins came out to me as transgender/nonbinary in 2015. Firstly, that they were too young to label themselves. (They weren’t.) I also had an internal response of fear for my kid’s safety, and a sense of isolation because I didn’t know other families like ours. I only knew I wanted to be there for my kid. So, I told my kid that I love them, and nothing would change that!
Although parents can be overwhelmed because there is a lot to learn and fast, I had no idea how much it would fundamentally change how I think. It’s taught me that it’s not necessary to fully understand a person to accept their truth when they offer it to you. We should feel honoured when somebody trusts us enough to share that truth with us. In addition to the joy of seeing my kid come fully into who they are, I’m grateful for this new perspective and for the people who would not be in my life otherwise."
Jaden, (LGBTQ2S+ community member, Pflag volunteer working to develop our support services in different languages)
"People who come from countries with criminalized sexual orientation laws and more stigma attached to 2SLGBTQ+ are less likely to find support from within their own communities. It is imperative that we all create a more inclusive environment for people from diverse cultural backgrounds to share their stories and empower the communities to live with love and safety on National Coming Out Day. We hear from parents regularly asking to speak with other parents from similar cultural backgrounds so they can feel understood and know their children will not be the only 2SLGBTQ+ individuals in their communities. Immigrant parents can also feel lonely and isolated when children come out to them, and it is harder to deal with the conflicts and stress when they have limited knowledge and resources on sexual orientation and gender identities to match their cultural expectations and understanding. "
The 519 Community Centre shared some great tips to remember today on National Coming Out Day:
Nobody should feel forced to come out before they are ready.
People might be in different phases of their journey. Coming out isn't something that just happens.
It is never too late to come out. Do it if and when you feel ready.
Lean on your chosen community and surround yourself with a support system. Your safety comes first.
Not being able to come out doesn't make you any less queer. You are still loved, and you still belong.
Coming out can be an ongoing, never-ending process. We see you. Be kind to yourself.
If you are out, questioning, or choosing not to be visible today, we support you.
You are loved. You are valid.
